The Emancipation Proclamation: The Man Who Freed the Gays


If you thought JP Morgan traders goofed when they made bad bets that resulted in $2 billion in losses for what Obama says is the best managed bank in America, well you obviously don’t hang out with the One-Percent-Occupy Wall Street group that met last night on Park Avenue in New York.

60 Wall Street-types, says Politico, paid close to $40,000 a pop to hear Obama, Man of the People, tell them whatever their guilt-ridden consciences wanted to hear.

Why guilt-ridden? Who knows?

Perhaps they weren’t held enough as a baby; perhaps they seek atonement in politics for the rapacity they practice in business life; perhaps they just don’t have much more left to blow money on than a sit down with the “First Gay President,” who according to the White House, doesn’t even know yet that he’s gay.

Those are just some of the reasons why someone might blow $40k to hear Obama, The Great Defender of Free Markets:

“I believe the free market is the greatest wealth generator devised by man," Obama said to the Wall Street suckers according to Politico. "Risk takers and innovators should be rewarded" because "we all benefit from free-enterprise."